Erinn Phillips

Travel, Adoption, Life in Charleston

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March 9, 2017 by: Erin

Thoughts from a Working Mom to Working Moms

I read a stat yesterday that stated 71% of Moms are working Moms. WOW! 71%. Really?! I’m not going to lie, I was a little taken aback by that number. 
Why does it not feel this way? It feels a lot like a lone island sometimes a lot of the time.
I had a whole plane ride without working wi-fi to ponder this question and my initial reaction to that stat. I felt guilty y’all for feeling this way! 
I tried to justify my reaction, I thought of things like, well… I live in the South where it’s traditional to stay at home with your little one. And maybe I feel that way because all the time people assume I don’t work (#annoying) and only write this little blog, but then again I don’t talk a lot about my full-time job on social and in person so why would they know?
Next I had to wonder how they quantified “working”. I mean heck, I always say I’m the selfish, weak one in the world of Mamas. I spend all day by myself working away when a stay-at-home Mom’s work is 24/7 with not even a bathroom break to themselves. That’s more work than any “working” Mom does any day. 
When Sully was born, Ry and I sat down and talked about what life after baby would look like. He said to me that he was fully supportive if I wanted to stay at home. (Have I ever mentioned how I have the best husband in the whole entire earth?!) My head filled with days of love and cuddles, yoga and consistent, quality blogging. 
Yet, I couldn’t shake the feeling that maybe that just wasn’t my path. I had worked so darned hard to get where I was currently in my career at one of the best companies in the US (ranked in Fortune’s top 200). I landed my first office paying gig when I was 13 and did four internships in college. If you count babysitting, my working life goes back even earlier. 
Well wouldn’t ya know it, a few weeks into Sully’s little life I knew I owed it to my daughter to work. For my sanity, for hers, for my husband’s, heck for my dog’s!
I’m not saying it’s the easy route. And I’m definitely not saying it’s for everyone. 
Just yesterday morning as I was on my way to the airport I realized I was walking out of the front door holding my daughter’s blanket for goodness sake. The thought of not holding her, even a piece of her, for three days made my whole body ache (if you’re wondering, I did up turning around and putting it back so she didn’t go without).
It sucks leaving, it sucks waving goodbye every morning as she goes to school, it sucks realizing you missed her say her first full sentence because she said it at school (I cried off and on about that for hours, not even going to lie). 
But you know what’s great? The moments we do have together are soooo full of love and play time on the floor and cuddles, no devices, no computers, no distractions. Just us. Just me and my Sully girl. She gets all of me for 5 hours a day and all weekend. Not enough time, but it’s what we’ve got.
I see her mimic things I do and things I say and faces I make all the time. Just the other day I listened to her try to sing “Jesus Loves Me” in the car, slip on her shoes standing up and struggle to “put on” mascara (with the lid on) all in that same day. Pure Mama joy. Gah I’m so proud of that kid you guys. 
It also helps that she absolutely adores her school and loves seeing her teachers and friends – all of which she knows their names – each day. 
I know she’ll grow up seeing her Mama provide for her family. She’ll see her Mama run a boardroom and a home (or at least try). She’ll see me struggle and she’ll see me succeed. And most of all, I don’t ever doubt that she’ll know how much I love her.
So for all you working Mamas… you do you. Don’t feel guilty. Don’t feel like you’re a lone island. 71% of us are right here with you. Take that stat with comfort, not with disbelief. Ok? Okay. Now let’s go raise some amazing kiddos!

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Erin

About Erin

An all-around happy girl who loves to put darling into every little detail in life – from DIY home decor to entertaining to travel and style

5 on Friday: Seeking advice, Shopbop sale favs + More!
Fun at The Cloister with J.McLaughlin

Comments

  1. 1

    AvatarJessica says

    July 7, 2019 at 7:57 pm

    I can’t thank you enough for this post. I know it’s older but as I prepare to go back to work IN August and the thought of leaving my 3 year old baby girl kills me. I know my husband and I work for her to give her the best life possible full of travels.

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Instagram

  • What is it about a Christmas pageant that just warms a Mamas heart?! 🎄 #SullyLou knew every word to all the songs (English, French, and Spanish!), sang them enthusiastically, remembered the moves, and just beamed with joy from the stage. I’m so proud of her 😭. How is she becoming such a big girl so fast?! Speaking of big, she was the only girl on the back pew because she’s so tall. 🤷🏼‍♀️ I love you my Sully girl. I am so so so incredibly proud of you my mooks.
  • Run like the wind bullseye! Not the most IG worthy picture, although that is Kensington Palace in the background, hey Kate! 👋🏻 But I'm doing it y'all. Registered for the @cooperriverbridgerun which is arguably Charleston's biggest race of the year. Have I ever run a 10k? Nope. Have I ever run a 5k? Yes, and it was six years ago. 🤣Watch me work... 🏃🏼‍♀️🏃🏼‍♀️🏃🏼‍♀️
  • Throwback to one of the most Christmas-y places in London! Tonight we enjoyed our own little slice of Christmas with the Mount Pleasant parade (see Stories!) 🎄🎅 ☃️ We may not be spending our December abroad or in Hawaii this year, but gosh it sure does feel good to be home sweet home in Charleston!
  • Do you go to THERAPY? Why is that word so scary? 🚨 Why do we feel shame in saying we go? 👉🏻 Tonight in my Stories a bunch of strangers across the internet grouped together to share therapists they recommend in cities across the US and even in London. I feel like knowing who to go to is one of the hardest first steps, hopefully, we've helped you with that. 💗 👇🏻 Feel free to comment below, if you're comfortable, with any other therapist recommendations you'd like to share or tell us about your therapy experience!
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Ok so why the photo of me in the Sahara Desert for a 5am camel ride sunrise? 🐪 Well, soon after this photo was taken, I walked into a therapist's office in London. Why? Secondary infertility. I wrote about this on the blog (link in profile), but I felt so, so broken y'all. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
All the travel we were doing was reminding me of all the joy, joy, joy down in my heart 😉 and I realized how this feeling of brokenness was dragging me down. And I didn't want it to turn into something bad. So off I went. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Over a year later and I've found my gal here in Charleston and I still go every month. 👍🏻 Even though I don't feel broken any longer. In fact, I feel optimistic and hopeful for our future adopted child. 👨‍👩‍👧‍👧 It's just good to talk it out y'all. To talk out everything occupying your brain space and keeping you up at night here or there. Not only that, but therapists have TOOLS. They're so equipped to teach you #allthethings you never even knew you needed to know!
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
As we go into the holidays 🎄 which admit it you guys, we put so much pressure and tie so much meaning to.... I want you to consider therapy. A lot of insurance providers will help you cover the cost. It doesn't hurt to book an appointment and see if it's for you. And you might have to shop around for the right fit, but you'll find it. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
At the end of the day, I believe that if we're all more mentally stable humans, we'll all contribute to a better, kinder world. 🌎
  • One thing I never got tired of during 14 weeks of guests visiting us in London (and most all of them staying with us in our 500 sq ft flat with 1 bathroom 😬)... was the afternoon tea!!! ☕️ Gah I just loved it. All my fancy tea party dreams from my childhood got to come true over and over! ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Don’t miss it when you visit the UK! 🇬🇧 This was one of my favorites and top recommendations, The Park Room at @grosvenorhouselondon. Check on @opentable for the special reservation where a glass of bubbly 🥂 is included with your tea! ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
PS: Hit that little bookmark to save this post for later so you remember where to go when visiting London! 💂🏼‍♂️
  • Entrepreneur-ing and mom-ing like a boss this week y'all. I'll explain more soon. 😉 Have you gotten your ticket yet to my business @pinckneypalm's Master Your Social? 🎟 Seriously, get on it, I think I'm only going to sell 5️⃣ more seats and then close the program. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
If you're not in the know, MYS is my 6-week online social media coaching program, No, this is NOT an e-course or webinar. 🙅🏼‍♀️ This is me actually live teaching you a new topic each week, giving you the steps and resources to implement what we talk about, and then holding you accountable. Not to mention, throwing some epic online dance parties 💃🏼💃🏼 and having you join in community with other entrepreneurs. We start January 21st... wouldn't it be awesome to go into 2020 with a social media strategy and knowledge of all the tips and tricks?!
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
So GO!!! Get your ticket via the link in my profile right now @erinn.phillips or at pinckneypalm.com/shop. 🌴 I seriously do a happy dance when I see your purchase come through. THANK YOU for supporting my small business!!! ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Also, friends, we made up a cute gift card if you want to receive Master Your Social for Christmas 🎁 or if you want to gift it to someone else! 👉🏻 DM me with any questions on Master Your Social!
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Photo: @anerisphotos
Dress: @cabanalife
  • Snapped in my element. Hunting for gems in the flea markets abroad. 🌏 The first deals I looked for on Cyber Monday? Flight deals! Go search @skyscanner, I even found NYC to London for less than $300 a person. Considering we have a baby on the way and no earthly idea when that baby gets here I didn't hit purchase but dang I wanted to. Y'all do it for me! ✈️
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Psst... there may or may be a small batch of goodies coming to @theshopabroad just in time for you to snag Christmas gifts that are one of a kind (this time from German Christmas markets) 🇩🇪🎄🎁
  • December in Charleston means sandals and iced tea. ❄️ Ryan and I realized this past weekend that between his work travel and mine, plus family trips, we’ll cover 2 countries outside of the US and 3 states in addition to holiday travel throughout South Carolina in the month of December. 😬 ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Weirdly, I’m not stressed about it. I’m just so excited to share with y’all what some of this travel is for (not a baby unfortunately, yet!) and to see so many good friends and family! 🎉
  • Happy Thanksgiving from The Phillips Family! Here’s our little Instagram vs. reality for ya. 🤪 I hope you all have a day filled with gratitude, love, and full bellies, surrounded by the people you love most. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Ten years ago on this holiday my father-in-law passed away, so it’s always one that is hard but also one where we get to remember Bob. I only spent time with him a handful of times but the way he has shaped his children and how much he means to Ryan is something I cherish. Gosh am I grateful that we were chosen to witness his greatness for the short time God lent him to us on this earth. 💗 I’m sending prayers to those of you who may also be dealing with hard things on Thanksgiving. You are loved and thought of today, friend. Have a wonderful Thanksgiving 🦃

@erinn.phillips on Instagram

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Instagram

  • What is it about a Christmas pageant that just warms a Mamas heart?! 🎄 #SullyLou knew every word to all the songs (English, French, and Spanish!), sang them enthusiastically, remembered the moves, and just beamed with joy from the stage. I’m so proud of her 😭. How is she becoming such a big girl so fast?! Speaking of big, she was the only girl on the back pew because she’s so tall. 🤷🏼‍♀️ I love you my Sully girl. I am so so so incredibly proud of you my mooks.
  • Run like the wind bullseye! Not the most IG worthy picture, although that is Kensington Palace in the background, hey Kate! 👋🏻 But I'm doing it y'all. Registered for the @cooperriverbridgerun which is arguably Charleston's biggest race of the year. Have I ever run a 10k? Nope. Have I ever run a 5k? Yes, and it was six years ago. 🤣Watch me work... 🏃🏼‍♀️🏃🏼‍♀️🏃🏼‍♀️
  • Throwback to one of the most Christmas-y places in London! Tonight we enjoyed our own little slice of Christmas with the Mount Pleasant parade (see Stories!) 🎄🎅 ☃️ We may not be spending our December abroad or in Hawaii this year, but gosh it sure does feel good to be home sweet home in Charleston!
  • Do you go to THERAPY? Why is that word so scary? 🚨 Why do we feel shame in saying we go? 👉🏻 Tonight in my Stories a bunch of strangers across the internet grouped together to share therapists they recommend in cities across the US and even in London. I feel like knowing who to go to is one of the hardest first steps, hopefully, we've helped you with that. 💗 👇🏻 Feel free to comment below, if you're comfortable, with any other therapist recommendations you'd like to share or tell us about your therapy experience!
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Ok so why the photo of me in the Sahara Desert for a 5am camel ride sunrise? 🐪 Well, soon after this photo was taken, I walked into a therapist's office in London. Why? Secondary infertility. I wrote about this on the blog (link in profile), but I felt so, so broken y'all. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
All the travel we were doing was reminding me of all the joy, joy, joy down in my heart 😉 and I realized how this feeling of brokenness was dragging me down. And I didn't want it to turn into something bad. So off I went. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Over a year later and I've found my gal here in Charleston and I still go every month. 👍🏻 Even though I don't feel broken any longer. In fact, I feel optimistic and hopeful for our future adopted child. 👨‍👩‍👧‍👧 It's just good to talk it out y'all. To talk out everything occupying your brain space and keeping you up at night here or there. Not only that, but therapists have TOOLS. They're so equipped to teach you #allthethings you never even knew you needed to know!
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
As we go into the holidays 🎄 which admit it you guys, we put so much pressure and tie so much meaning to.... I want you to consider therapy. A lot of insurance providers will help you cover the cost. It doesn't hurt to book an appointment and see if it's for you. And you might have to shop around for the right fit, but you'll find it. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
At the end of the day, I believe that if we're all more mentally stable humans, we'll all contribute to a better, kinder world. 🌎
  • One thing I never got tired of during 14 weeks of guests visiting us in London (and most all of them staying with us in our 500 sq ft flat with 1 bathroom 😬)... was the afternoon tea!!! ☕️ Gah I just loved it. All my fancy tea party dreams from my childhood got to come true over and over! ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Don’t miss it when you visit the UK! 🇬🇧 This was one of my favorites and top recommendations, The Park Room at @grosvenorhouselondon. Check on @opentable for the special reservation where a glass of bubbly 🥂 is included with your tea! ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
PS: Hit that little bookmark to save this post for later so you remember where to go when visiting London! 💂🏼‍♂️
  • Entrepreneur-ing and mom-ing like a boss this week y'all. I'll explain more soon. 😉 Have you gotten your ticket yet to my business @pinckneypalm's Master Your Social? 🎟 Seriously, get on it, I think I'm only going to sell 5️⃣ more seats and then close the program. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
If you're not in the know, MYS is my 6-week online social media coaching program, No, this is NOT an e-course or webinar. 🙅🏼‍♀️ This is me actually live teaching you a new topic each week, giving you the steps and resources to implement what we talk about, and then holding you accountable. Not to mention, throwing some epic online dance parties 💃🏼💃🏼 and having you join in community with other entrepreneurs. We start January 21st... wouldn't it be awesome to go into 2020 with a social media strategy and knowledge of all the tips and tricks?!
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
So GO!!! Get your ticket via the link in my profile right now @erinn.phillips or at pinckneypalm.com/shop. 🌴 I seriously do a happy dance when I see your purchase come through. THANK YOU for supporting my small business!!! ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Also, friends, we made up a cute gift card if you want to receive Master Your Social for Christmas 🎁 or if you want to gift it to someone else! 👉🏻 DM me with any questions on Master Your Social!
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Photo: @anerisphotos
Dress: @cabanalife
  • Snapped in my element. Hunting for gems in the flea markets abroad. 🌏 The first deals I looked for on Cyber Monday? Flight deals! Go search @skyscanner, I even found NYC to London for less than $300 a person. Considering we have a baby on the way and no earthly idea when that baby gets here I didn't hit purchase but dang I wanted to. Y'all do it for me! ✈️
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Psst... there may or may be a small batch of goodies coming to @theshopabroad just in time for you to snag Christmas gifts that are one of a kind (this time from German Christmas markets) 🇩🇪🎄🎁
  • December in Charleston means sandals and iced tea. ❄️ Ryan and I realized this past weekend that between his work travel and mine, plus family trips, we’ll cover 2 countries outside of the US and 3 states in addition to holiday travel throughout South Carolina in the month of December. 😬 ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Weirdly, I’m not stressed about it. I’m just so excited to share with y’all what some of this travel is for (not a baby unfortunately, yet!) and to see so many good friends and family! 🎉

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